


For once just let me lose myself

by TalkshowsOnMute (Drearytale)



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, High School AU, Homophobia, M/M, Slight badboy Harry, Smutty-ish stuff in later chapters, very close Nouis friendship because I love them
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-18
Updated: 2014-04-12
Packaged: 2018-01-12 23:36:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1204690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Drearytale/pseuds/TalkshowsOnMute
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis has trusting issues, which might be okay, because Harry doesn't want other people to trust him.<br/>Niall trusts too much - at least he think so. Liam wants to show him that it isn't true.<br/>Zayn just wants to get through school without too much trouble, but that's not easy with friends like his own.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Walls and Stones

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Skylar Grey - Dance without you
> 
>  
> 
> I wanted to do a High School AU for quite a while now, so here we go. I hope you like it.

 

 

_Like anyone would be  
I am flattered by your fascination with me... _

Louis looked around confused as he heard the first sounds of 'Uninvited' by Alanis Morissette. He wasn't confused about the music playing in the first place, it wasn't that surprising since that song was his ringtone at the moment, but were had he left his damned phone? His room was a mess, a real one. He never understood the people who giggled nervously and mumbled something about 'not having cleaned up that day', and when he entered the room it was completely tidy. Maybe a few pillows on the ground or a pile of papers on the desk – in which universe was that messy? Those people would probably get a heart attack visiting him.

 _...But you, you're not allowed_  
You're uninvited  
An unfortunate slight...

Finally he found the phone under his bed and glanced at the display. A smile crossed his face before he picked up the call.

“Ni, hey! Miss me already? We still have two hours left before I'm supposed to pick you up.” He frowned as he got no reply from the other boy. “Dude, can you hear me or do you have your phone in the pocket? Don't tell me I'm talking to your ass.”

“Lou...” The voice sounded, in one word, miserable.

Louis was worried in an instant. Niall was his best friend for years now, and he was always happy, literally _always._ Even when they'd been in some... situations that wasn't actually amusing... Niall had been the one who'd pulled Louis up when he was down. The boy had the wonderful power to not let things get to him too much. Something must be really wrong to make him sound like this. “Are you okay?” The only respond was a sniffling sound. “Hey, Ni, are you crying? What's going on? C'mon, you scare me!”

“Can you pick me up, please? Now? I'm at the hospital!”

“Oh my god, are you okay? What happened?” Louis jumped from his bed and grabbed his bags that thankfully were packed already.

“It's... it's okay, I'm okay, but... just get me, Lou.”

“Already on my way”, he promised. “I'll be there in... hm... 20 minutes, I guess!”

“Thanks!” The connection broke. Louis took a deep breath and pushed his fringe away from his forehead before he run down the stairs, throwing his bags onto the corridor's floor, straight into the kitchen where his mother was about to prepare dinner.

“Let me guess, you're already so hungry that... oh, Boo, what's wrong?” The woman instantly left her working place and crossed the space between them as her eyes landed on her only son.

“Niall called, he needs me to pick him up. I don't know what's going on, but he needs me, mom!” Louis wrapped his arms around his mother and hugged her. “I'm sorry, but I have to go.”

“I know!” She smiled softly and kissed his forehead. “Call me when you're at school, okay? You know that I'm always worried when you're driving alone.”

“Mom!” Louis rolled his eyes and shifted impatiently. “You tell me that every two weeks when I'm heading back, don't you think I already know the routine? And I really, really have to go now.”

His mother pulled a few bills out of nowhere. “Here, you haven't eaten anything yet. Buy some dinner for Niall and yourself, in one of your beloved fast food restaurants.”

“Thanks mom! I love you!” He hugged her again. “Tell the girls that I'm sorry and that we'll do something fun the other week when I'm here again, okay?”

“Sure I will. Love you too, Lou. And don't forget...”

“...to call, I know! Bye”

He left his house, threw his bags in the trunk of his car and entered it. It only took a little searching until he found his glasses. He grimaced slightly while putting them on, he really preferred wearing contacts, but thanks to his hay fever his eyes were way to irritated at the moment. He couldn't keep them in for more than one hour before it started to burn.

The way to the hospital seemed so much longer than usually, and he couldn't stop his mind from presenting him colorful images of the worst scenarios that could have been happening. He drove faster than he normally, so he reached the hospital within 15 minutes. He hadn't even asked where exactly he should pick Niall up, and the hospital was huge. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and hit quick dial.

“Louis?”

“Yeah. I'm standing outside, where are you?”

“Just wait, I'm coming out.”

It only took a few minutes for Niall to reach the car, but it seemed like an eternity to Louis. As the boy finally opened the door and plopped down into the seat, Louis was drumming his fingers restlessly against the steering wheel.

“What happened?”, he asked already before his friend was properly seated.

“Nothing. It's okay, just let's go. We have to drive by my mum's though, I haven't my stuff with me.”

“I drove here like there were hellhounds chasing me, and you won't tell me anything?”, Louis asked unbelieving. “Then at least look at me, Ni.”

The blonde sighed and turned his head, his usual smile slightly present on his face, but what drew Louis' attention was a nasty, dark bruise underneath his right cheekbone.

“It's nothing”, he assured once more as he noticed how his friend's eyes widened in shock. “I was a little wound up as I called you, but it's really nothing to worry about. I only came here because it's Sunday and there are no other doctors working today.”

“Who did this?”, Louis asked, seemingly having not heard Niall's comforting words at all. “We won't leave until you spit it.”

“Bugger”, Niall cursed under his breath. “You remember Jason and Michael?”

“Sure”, Louis confirmed. Jason and Michael had been a part of the gang who'd been a huge part of the reason that he and Niall had quit their local High School, even quit their home town and moved in together to get a fresh start.

It sounded so grown-up, 'moved in together'. In fact, the flat was in one of the houses Niall's uncle owned. He let them live there for free, and he lived only one block away himself, which probably was the only reason their parents had been okay when they told them their idea.

But that wasn't the point now. Louis managed to get his thought back on track just in time to hear a small “They remembered me, too.”

“Shit.” Louis bit his lips. “Why did they...”

“Because they are idiots, Lou. They don't need a reason to be assholes.” Niall shrugged. “Look, I won't start crying and pour my heart out to you now, we can totally skip this part. They pushed me – well, Jason did, if you're up for details – but it's nothing I wouldn't survive. So can we please leave, now? I'm pretty sure this is a non-parking zone.”

Louis hesitated for a moment. Niall seemed close enough to his usual self, a little too quiet and a little too serious, but he decided to let it go for now and started the engine.

He let it go for the rest of the day, in fact. If Niall had wanted to talk he would have listened, of course. But the blonde boy didn't seem to have the urge, and Louis wasn't that much of a pusher. So he said nothing, not even as Niall followed him into his room after he'd said good night and suggested a Supernatural marathon none of them could really afford since they had school in the morning. He just let him climb into his bed, put a protecting arm around his friend and started an episode.

 

***

The next morning, when they headed to their different classes, Niall seemed to be fine again. He hadn't quite an excuse for the bruise, but that wouldn't be much of a problem, it wasn't like anybody would ask. Louis and Niall flew a bit under the radar of the Harrison High.

Louis sat on his chair in the back of the classroom and pulled his notepad and a few pens out of his bag, starting to draw the outlines of a figure until his Spanish teacher entered the room.

She greeted the class and looked around with an unamused expression. It took a moment for Louis to notice that the three desks in front of his own were empty. Again. It was almost ridiculous how often those guys overslept and arrived late but never had to deal with any consequences. But what was the saying? Fortune favors fools.

The teacher wasn't halfway through the attendance check when it knocked and just a moment later said three fools came in. It was never only one of them, almost like they only were available as package.

Zayn Malik, Liam Payne and Harry Styles. The trouble-triple, as Louis liked to call them. When he was alone with Niall, of course. Who would want to mess with those guys?

First of all, Zayn. He was really quiet most of the time, and he wasn't tall or bulky either. Maybe Louis would have tried to befriend him when things had been different, but he had his backstory and Zayn had his friends and anyway, it was better if he stuck to Niall until they were finished with High School. At college, everything would be different.

Then Liam. Captain of the Hockey team. Member of the Lacrosse team. Last year Louis had physical education with him, and this dude was not from this world when it came to sports.

And then there was Harry – the one who didn't seem to do anything at all, but was terrifying as hell sometimes with his sneaky remarks. He dressed really weird at times, there were days he looked like a homeless grandpa, but nobody ever dared to tease him.

Okay. That was a shallow description of either one of them, but Louis didn't know anything more. He'd never tried to get to know them. The plan was staying out of trouble for his remaining High School time, and he wouldn't jeopardize that for any guy at school, no matter how hot they were. And yeah... they _were_ hot. Really, really hot. Which was one more reason to back off.

When they moved over to their desks, Liam seemed to search his eyes for a moment. Nonsense, why would he? Louis quickly duck his head and let his fringe fall over his glasses. The boys took their seats and the lesson continued. Louis wasn't able to concentrate at all, which he blamed on the lack of sleep he got last night, so he spent the whole time sketching more, transforming the faceless person he started to draw in the beginning into Catwoman. He'd always had a thing for superheroes. It might be the fact that most of them started out as ordinary people, who had to deal with their own lives and their own shit and then one day... bam... something happened and they had all those special powers and tried to make the world a better place.

He was so absorbed in his work that he didn't notice the lesson was finished. It wasn't until the other students were leaving the room until he looked up from the page. The classroom was almost cleared out completely, so Louis quickly shove his stuff into his bag and got up as well.

“Hey Louis.”

The small, brunette boy flinched as someone called his name out as soon as he walked through the door into the hallway. And not just anyone, no. It had to be Liam Payne, who – if he remembered correctly – never talked to him before. It was surprising that he even knew his name.

“Yeah?”, he asked, trying not to let his uncertainty show. It wasn't really easy, especially not because Zayn and Harry waited just a few steps away. Maybe he would have been able to deal with one of them, but all three at a time? No way.

Liam smiled kindly while Zayn looked a little skeptical and Harry... well, was there a time he didn't look 100 percent done? Louis couldn't tell. Strange boys.

“I've seen your boyfriend earlier. He's hurt.”

“He's not...”, Louis began to protest, but Liam interrupted him before he could even finish the sentence.

“Yes, he is. Looks like he got punched in the face.”

“Yeah. No. I mean... he's not my boyfriend.”

Liam blinked a few times, obviously surprised by the news. “Oh. I'm sorry, I just thought~”

“I have to go now.” This time Louis was the interrupting one. It was ridiculous anyway. Why would Liam even care? And, way more important, it wasn't good at all that the boy suspected them to be gay. Okay, they were, but they didn't want anybody to know. That was what get all the shit started at their last school. Everything was fine until the others found out.

Maybe it was a test. Or maybe Liam would really be nice about it, but he wasn't the only student here. And especially his friends, Zayn and Harry, could easily be the next Jason and Michael. It was too much of a risk.

“Just... is he okay?”, Liam asked hesitantly.

“Sure he is”, Louis answered flatly and turned to go.

“Li?” The deep voice belonged to Harry, and he looked even more pissed than he did before. “We wanna go for a smoke, so are you finished with your smalltalk?”

“I guess so”, Liam sighed. “See you in class, Louis.”

Louis made a small noise that could be interpreted as a 'see you' as well and left. He walked quickly until he was around a corner and safe from the other boy's eyes.

What had that been? See you in class? Like... No way. That was nothing that was supposed to happen. Liam had to stay with those other two guys, and Louis had to stay invisible. That's the way it had to be. The way he wanted it. But all of a sudden, maybe for the first time since he switched schools, he felt visible.

 

***

Louis was zapping through the TV programs when he heard a key unlocking the door.

“Hey Tommo. You here?”, he heard his flatmate shouting from the entrance.

“Living room, watching telly”, he yelled back and cuddled deeper into his blanket. There were a few footsteps, then Niall's face peeked through the door.

“Good. You're not dead, you also still got both arms and legs. Care to explain why you left early without saying a goddamn word to me? I had to take the fucking bus home as I finally figured out that you were already gone.”

“Didn't feel like school.”

“Well, who does ever?”, Niall questioned. “Hang on, I'll be back in a minute.”

“Like I planned on moving anytime soon.” Louis grinned and pulled the blanket closer towards his chin, a little sleepy from the cozy warmth.

It really didn't take much more than a minute for Niall to come back into the room. When he did, he carried a bowl of cereals and a bottle of coke. “Move your ass, man.” He slid onto the couch as well and pulled his legs up, folding them under his body in a way that looked anything else than comfortable. While he started eating Louis reached for the coke, not bothering to get up to fetch them two glasses. Why should he, as far as they knew none of them were contagious. He took a long sip, then put the bottle on the table in front of them, concentrating on the moving pictures again.

Niall finished his cereals before he put the bowl aside. “You okay?”, he asked, watching Louis from the corner of his eyes.

Louis snorted. “I should be the one asking you”, he realized. “How's your cheek feeling?”

“I think I'll survive”, Niall sighed dramatically and pointed towards the TV, which now showed a promo for the latest Grey's Anatomy episode. They didn't watch it, of course, but the beeping of all the monitors were the perfect background noise for such a remark in the blonde's mind.

“I'm sure you will”, Louis agreed drily. “No, but honestly. Are you okay?”

“Sure. I'd like to think that it makes me look a little dangerous and mysterious, but to be honest, no one even noticed. Which isn't surprising at all.”

“Liam did”, Louis suddenly remembered. “Payne. Trouble-triple Liam”, he explained further when he found his best friend staring at him with a blank expression.

“How would you know?”

“He told me. Asked me what happened to my boyfriend.”

Niall shouldn't look so smug right now, Louis thought. At least a little bit shocked, since they'd thought that they kept the fact they were gay from the other students. It had made him run away and ditch school for the rest of the day, so was it too much to ask? But no, Niall seemed literally delighted.

“And what did you say?”

“That you're okay. And not my boyfriend. And then I left.” Louis shrugged. He raised a brow sceptically as his friend giggled at his words.

“One day you'll get an award for the most social human being ever known”, Niall teased and reached out to ruffle Louis' hair, but the brunette guy batted his hand away.

“Fuck off”, Louis muttered. “I didn't even want to talk. He forced it on me with his question.”

“Yeah. That's called having a conversation. People do those things, Lou.”

“I know, I talk a lot. To you.”

“That hardly counts, don't you think?”

“I think I prefer staying out of trouble rather than talk to nice-looking guys with broad shoulders who could easily throw me through the complete hallway.”

Slowly the smile faded from Niall's face. “Where did that come from, now? Did he do anything? Threatened you?”

“No. Can you shut up now?”

“I don't think I can, to be honest. What did he do?”

Louis tried to ignore his friend, but Niall could be annoyingly patient if he wanted to. “Nothing, okay?”, he snapped after a minute. “He was perfectly nice. But you know as well as I do that that means nothing. I won't let him smile at me and say 'see you' and stuff, just to be pushed into a locker the next time I turn my back on him.”

“Some people are just nice because they really are, Lou. Ever considered that?”

“Stop talking to me like I'm an idiot. We didn't came here to make friends.”

“Sure”, Niall agreed and caressed Louis' cheek. “But it still wouldn't hurt if we did, right?”

“We will. At college.” Louis crossed his arms tightly in front of his chest and turned his head away, a clear sign that he wanted this conversation to be over.

“Okay”, Niall said softly and got up. Instead of leaving, he hesitated for a moment before he spoke again. “I'm just scared that you won't know how to be friends with other people anymore by then. You built your walls up pretty high. If someone's willing to climb them, let them try at least.” He pressed a gentle kiss into Louis hair and left into his own room, giving his friend the chance to think about what they just talked about.

Hopefully Louis would do that instead of brooding. He'd changed so much over the last years. Niall remembered how loud Louis used to be, how open to the world. He had been too exhausting for a lot of people, it had been hard to keep up with him. But it had been totally worth it, for all the fun one could have with the small guy. For the loyal friend everybody gained once he found his way into his heart. And now?

Louis blamed himself for everything that happened, that was one thing Niall was absolutely positive about, though Louis had never said that out loud. But he had been the one who told Michael that he way gay, and well... that was the start. Niall almost wished that Louis would phrase that someday, so they could argue about it. So he could assure him that it wasn't his fault at all. That the answer couldn't be simply to refuse to trust anybody around them.

Louis was becoming hard. And Niall would be damned if he allowed his best friend to turn to stone.

 

***

The next morning in school, Niall knew something had to change. Louis completely refused to get up today, claiming to have slept next to nothing for two nights in a row now. But well, he'd decided to take that as a positive sign, if Louis had been awake most of the night, there was a chance that he really thought about their conversation.

Nonetheless, it was boring as hell with nobody to sit by at lunchtime. Sometimes Niall wished that Louis would loosen up a bit, allowing other people in their lives. Not that anybody had made an effort to, though.

Except of...

Niall let his eyes wander through the cafeteria. The boy he was looking for wasn't there, and he wasn't really able to remember if he met them here anytime before. Maybe not. Didn't his friends smoke? Yeah, he was pretty sure they did. And it was a beautiful day, so chances might be good to find him outside.

He didn't have to search for a long time. When he went through the door into the still a little pale spring sun, his eyes fell on three boys. The trouble-triple, Niall recalled Louis' words and snickered. Without thinking twice he walked towards the guys and cleared his throat.

“Hey. You're Liam, right?”

Said boy turned around and let his eyes wander across Niall's face, his lips forming a light smile. “I am”, he confirmed. “Is there anything I can do for you?”

“Yes. No, I mean, no. I...”

Suddenly it didn't seem like a good idea to talk to Liam anymore. More than that, it was an absolute stupid plan. And he kinda felt like he betrayed Louis. Niall looked over the other two boys who watched the scene curiously. And maybe a bit amused. Dickheads. What if Louis was right all the time?

There were fingers snapping in front of his face, causing Niall to flinch slightly. “Hey. You still there, blondie?”

“Niall”, he informed absently. What was he even doing here? If Louis had decided not to trust those guys, who was he to try to change that? He should back off as quick as possible.

“Niall then, well. Louis Timlinson's not-boyfriend.”

“Tom”, Niall corrected automatically, still trying to figure out how he could escape right now.

“Tom?” Liam blinked confused. “Who is Tom, now?”

“Tomlinson, not Timlinson”, he specified. “That's Louis' name. Not that it's important. Forget it. I better should head off and~”

“Whoa. Not so fast, blon~... Niall. Still don't know what you wanted to tell me.”

“I...” Niall's brain – reliable as it was – wasn't working at all. “I wanted to thank you”, he finally said. “Lou told me you asked if I were okay, and... nobody here did ever do that, so...” Well, wasn't he just a genius? Not just that he was talking to Liam against Louis specific wish, no, he made himself seem like the absolute pity-case. “Thanks, okay? And bye.”

“Why are you so quick to leave? Just like Louis yesterday. I talked to him and he ran off and then he was gone.”

Niall huffed out a breath and rubbed his forehead, but stayed exactly where he stood. “Well. Yeah. Sorry.”

“Is he okay? I was a bit worried.”

There was nothing but honest sympathy in Liam's eyes, as much as Niall tried to detect a hint of anything else. “He's a bit under the weather, but he's fine. Will be back tomorrow, I think.”

“Ah. Okay.” Liam nodded and smiled even brighter. “Thanks for telling me, mate. And I'm glad you're fine.”

“Yeah...” Niall trailed off again.

“Since you seem to have decided to stay with us... want a fag?”, Zayn asked, but took half a step back when Niall whirled around and glared at him.

“Fuck off”, he hissed. “I should have known Louis was right. I made a fool out of me, didn't I?” Angrily he turned around and left, even Liam's call couldn't hold him back this time.

“What the hell did I do?”, Zayn asked confused and looked down at the box with his cigarettes in his hand. “If he doesn't smoke he could have said just that.”

“Kid is maniac”, Harry answered and pulled one out of the box himself. It Niall didn't want to, his loss. Though he seemed like he could need a little nicotine to call him down. “Just like his friend yesterday.”

“I don't think they are”, Liam said slowly and turned back to his friends again. “There's more to it.”

“More shit we don't need to hear, yeah”, Harry nodded. “Let it go, Li. It's not worth it.”

“Maybe you're right...” Liam sighed, but he didn't finish his sentence.

_Maybe you're not._


	2. Idiots and Girlfriends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm terribly sorry it took me that long to update again, but I had some serious shit going on in my rl. It will be quicker from now on, I promise. :)

“I am an idiot!”

“Lovely you noticed. How come?”, Louis asked and placed the book he was reading next to his bed when Niall stormed into his room, yelling these four words at him.

“Because I...” Niall stopped on his tracks and stared at his friend, who looked way too comfortable for his liking with his naked chest and the fluffy bedhead. “You are still in bed? Are you kidding me? Get up.”

“God, who are you? My mother?” Louis groaned and pulled the covers over his head.

“Luckily I'm not. I'd have gray hair by now, because you're such a pain in the ass. You're lazy, you know that? And I... Lou, I think I fucked up.”

Louis felt a weight plop down next to him and removed the blanket just enough to look at the blonde. “So? What did you do, Niall?”

“I... I went to talk to Liam today”, he began.

“What?” Louis jolted upwards. “Why did you do that?”

“I don't know. You weren't there. I was bored. He seemed nice enough.”

“That's not the point. I didn't want you too.”

“So what?” Sometimes Niall got a little annoyed with Louis. Not often, but every now and then. And right now was one of those moments. Wasn't he old enough to decide who he wanted to talk to himself?

“Ni. We don't know them. I don't want you to get hurt.”

Niall shook his head. He'd heard it all before, over and over again. And usually he liked to believe Louis, he knew that his friend was in fact looking out for him, but sometimes he wasn't sure anymore if it wasn't just an easy excuse for Louis. After all, he was the one who didn't give anybody the chance to get to know them.

“Who do you want to safe, Louis? Me or yourself?”, he asked sharply.

Louis flinched. For what seemed like minutes they just stared at each other.

What was Niall implying, he wondered nervously. That he was holding him back? And if... was it true? Louis pressed his lips together tightly.

“Even if you were right, in this special case”, Niall finished eventually. He looked really sad all of a sudden, and the older boy simply wasn't able to be angry anymore. A sad Niall, that was like... a kicked puppy or something. It was simply not allowed.

“I'm sorry”, Louis answered softly. “I wish I hadn't been.”

“Yeah... me too.”

“Need a cuddle?”

“I don't know.” Niall observed Louis' bare upper body sceptically. “Are you completely naked under there?”

“Nope. Got my joggers on.”

“Okay. Well, then... Yeah, I guess I could need a cuddle.”

“C'mere.” Louis opened his arms and let the younger boy snuggle close to him. “Want to tell me what happened? What's up with the sports guy... All muscles and no brain?”

If Liam did something to his Nialler, he seriously had to do something. He only had to figure out what exactly that could be. In comparison to him, Louis looked like a bean stick, and moreover, Liam always was accompanied by his two musketeers.

“No, it was more... his friends, you now? This Zayn-one. Liam was really kind, he even asked what happened to you since you disappeared after your talk and stuff. I thought we hit it off pretty well. But then the other guy started making fun of me.”

“What did he say?”

“The damn prick asked if I wanted a fag, so... hey!” Niall frowned when Louis let go of him rather quickly and watched him instead with a definitely inappropriate amused expression. “What's so funny now?”

“He offered you a fag.”

“Yeah.”

“A fag.”

“I said that before, what are you...” Niall interrupted himself when Louis burst out laughing so hard, that there were actual tears rolling down his cheeks. “Hey, are you shitting me?”

“N-no...”, Louis giggled and tried to hold himself together... rather less successful. “But... that was it?”

“Isn't that enough?”, Niall snapped, offended by Louis' behavior. “What's up with you? Last time someone called you a fag~”

“He didn't call you one.”

“Where's the difference? He offered me one, that's exactly as despising as calling me would have been.”

Louis shook his head and grinned while he wiped the tears away with the back of his hand. “You know Zayn is smoking, right?”

“And that's an excuse?”

“Aww, Ni!” Louis wrapped his arms around his friend once more. “You can be so cute sometimes. He didn't want to offend you. He asked if you wanted a _cigarette_. A butt. A fag. Whatever you want to call it.”

“He...” Niall blushed deep red. “No!”

“Well, I wasn't there, but it sounds to me like exactly that happened.”

“No. No no no! If that's true, I made a complete fool out of me.”

“Nah, don't know. They might find it endearing. I do, at least.”

“Shut up”, Niall pouted, his cheeks turning into a deep crimson red. “You are supposed to, you're my best friend. Shit. I'm such an idiot.”

“Yeah. You said that when you entered. But you're a really cute idiot, does that help?”

“Not really.”

Louis laughed softly and ruffled Niall's hair. “Hey, we need to re-dye it”, he noticed. “The brown is showing at the roots.”

“Great. I'm not just an idiot, I'm an idiot with badly dyed hair. My day keeps getting better and better.”

“Don't you dare to drown in self-pity, Ni. If it's so important to you, go and talk to him. Clear things up.”

“Never. I can't do it.”

“Because of me?”, Louis asked carefully. “I mean... I wouldn't be upset with you... a lot. You know. If you want to get to know other people, then go for it. Just... be a little attentive, okay?”

“I won't. It's too embarrassing”, Niall confessed. “I almost jumped Zayn for a harmless offer, they must think I'm crazy. Maybe it's better this way, right?”

“Yeah...” Louis was not so sure himself, which surprised him to no ends. He didn't need any friends besides Niall, didn't even want some. People sucked. Most of them really did.

And still. Maybe Ni had been right when they'd talked the day before. Maybe it wouldn't hurt. They didn't need to braid each others hair or whatever, but if there were people they could have a little talk to every now and than at school... yeah... maybe he wouldn't be completely against it.

Maybe it was about time to try something new.

 

***

 

When Louis sat in Spanish class the next day, he finished his drawing of Catwoman.

Yeah, sure, he should pay attention to the teacher. But. It was so boring, and his head was so full of other stuff. Sketching was relaxing to him.

“Nice work”, someone whispered. Louis looked up from his paper and noticed that Zayn had turned in his seat in front of him and was now watching the image.

Their teacher must have left the room, at least she was nowhere to be seen, and this time Louis was absolutely sure that the lesson wasn't over yet.

“Thanks”, he managed to say. His first instinct had been to make a snappy reply, but he remembered the decision he made yesterday. Trying new things and stuff. He had to start at some point, so maybe now would be a good occasion.

“The shadowing is great. She's kinda hot.”

“Well... I'm kinda gay, so I can't really judge”, Louis fired back, watching Zayn's reaction closely.

If this had been a test, Zayn would have passed it without any doubt. He didn't look shocked or disgusted the slightest, he just laughed it off. “Well. Then you should better draw batman, don't you think? Or maybe spidey.”

“Maybe”, Louis agreed. He smiled at Zayn a little bit uncomfortable, not used to talk to other people so much. By now it was 2/3 of the trouble-triple in two days - technically three, but since he skipped school yesterday, that day didn't count.

“I draw myself”, Zayn told him and finally looked up to meet his eyes. “Other style though, but I like yours pretty much.”

“Yeah. Maybe you can show me some of your stuff one day”, Louis answered, because wasn't that what people did? Giving vague answers, like 'yeah, we should totally meet up soon' and forget about it just a minute later. Nothing too deep, nothing too personal. He could handle this.

“I will”, Zayn smiled. In this moment, the door opened and their teacher returned to the room. “Hey, can I talk to you after class real quick?”, he whispered to Louis. “Just want to ask something.”

“Uhm... yeah, well, I guess...”

“Great.” Zayn, obviously satisfied with Louis' answer, turned back again.

About twenty minutes later they were allowed to leave. Louis dawdled a bit when he was packing his stuff, half hoping that Zayn's need for a cigarette would be stronger than his interest in a talk.

As it turned out, it wasn't. The dark-haired boy was waiting for him in the hallway.

Strangely enough, Liam and Harry were nowhere to be seen. It really was an unusual image to see a trouble-triplet separated from the others.

“So...”, Louis began and crossed his arms insecurely after he pushed his glasses upwards. “What's up?”

“Coming straight to the point, aren't ya?”, Zayn asked with a wry smile.

“It's just... you said you wanted to ask something, didn't you?”

“Right.” Zayn nodded. He wasn't that much of a talker himself, so he usually wouldn't mind Louis' straight forward type of talk, but he didn't really know how to phrase his question without sounding like a dork. “I don't know. You got that blonde friend, yeah?”

“Niall. Yeah. So, that was your question?” Louis raised an eyebrow.

“Don't be a twat, of course that wasn't it”, Zayn scolded lightly. “I just wondered if you know what made him so angry yesterday. One minute he was talking to Liam, and the next he was hissing at me like an angry cat. And to be honest, I don't even know what I did.”

Louis giggled softly before he was able to control himself. “Yeah, well. I kinda sorted it out with him. You should... maybe watch your words when you offer someone a cig, y'know?”

Louis could literally see the wheels turning in Zayn's head as he tried to remember what he'd said. Thirty seconds later, the confusion hadn't left his face, so Louis decided to jump in. "Look. If you really wanna know what was upsetting him, ask him. It's not my story to tell. Just... fag sometimes might not be the best word. But it's okay. Like I said, we figured that out. In fact, he's really embarrassed that he's gotten upset, so maybe don't tease him too much, okay?”

“You two are a bit weird, you know that?”

Louis rolled his eyes and turned away. After all, Zayn's question was answered, right?

“Wait! I didn't mean that in a mean way, really. It's just... you never talked to anyone before, and even now that I try to talk to you, you only are here to defend your friend. It's like... you two against the rest of the world, you see? That's why we thought he's your boyfriend.”

“You didn't even know I was gay.”

“Excellent radar when it comes to this stuff. But I won't tell anybody if you don't want me to.”

“Yeah, sure.” Louis laughed bitterly.

“I'm not that type of guy who's outing people against their will, Louis. Really.”

“Okay.” The brunette boy shrugged. Time would tell, right? “Thanks then, I guess.”

“You don't believe me”, Zayn noticed. Louis was surprised to see that the boy looked a little disappointed.

“I don't trust a lot people”, he mumbled excusing, shifting his weight from one leg to another awkwardly. He wasn't used to have to explain himself. “Old habit.”

Zayn didn't push. He smiled a bit and nodded. “Okay. You wanna come out with me? I mean... come outside the school, for a smoke, not come out like... uhm...”

“Okay.” Louis was smiling again. Zayn was surprisingly easy to be around. Nonetheless, he had to stay careful. He couldn't be sure if the boy was only playing him up just yet.

The second they were out of the school, a cigarette magically appeared between Zayn's lips. "D'you want one?", he asked while he already lit it up.

"I don't usually smoke. Sometimes I do, though. At parties, you know? Or when I'm stressed. Or~" He interrupted himself when Zayn handed him the package without any further question. With a sheepish smile he pulled a cigarette out and took the lighter out of Zayn's hand. "What part of my answer sounded like a 'yes' to you, by the way?", he asked curiously when he handed the stuff back.

"You were starting to ramble. That's a thing people tend to do when they are stressed. Or when they are overly excited, which you clearly aren't", Zayn explained. "Either way, you need to chill, dude. I won't bite you."

"I know." But did he really? Louis slowly blew out the smoke, feeling the nicotine calm him a little pretty much instantly.

In a way, he felt stupid that he got so tense just because he was accompanied by a person that wasn't Niall or a family member. He never used to be like this. In fact, he once loved to be around people, loved to be in the center of attention. He knew a freaking lot of people, back then. And naive as he'd used to be, he really had been convinced that they all had been his friends.

Zayn watched the boy who'd fallen silent again carefully. There really was something weird about Louis, he had no better words to put it into. It was something he wasn't really able to put his finger on, but something about him just didn't seem to fit. "Look", he started quietly. "If I'm really making you that uncomfortable, you can leave."

Louis head snapped up, eyes unfocused for a moment before they met Zayn's. "It's not... I was just thinking about some stuff, you know?"

"You're thinking about stuff a lot, don't you?", Zayn asked before he could stop himself.

"Of course I do. It's proven that the human brain never stops thinking. When I wouldn't think anymore, I'd probably be a zombie - and trust me, you'd noticed by now", Louis answered teasingly, though his voice had an unmistakeable undertone of 'back the fuck off'.

The following silence was cut by a short melody. "That was me", Zayn noticed and searched for his phone.

Louis snorted and bit down a remark about how Zayn was talking foreign languages. He didn't know if the other boy would get his type of humor.

"How creative are you?"

"Hu?" Louis shot Zayn a confused look. "How am I supposed to answer that?"

"I need a good excuse to get out of school. My girlfriend has no classes anymore today and wants to meet because we don't get to see each other that much. So. I need an idea."

"Just tell them you don't feel well. That's what I did."

Zayn grimaced. "I pulled that one a few times too often, I'm afraid. I was told to bring an attest from the doctor when I leave because of sickness from now on."

"That sucks." Louis nodded. "Then you need to change it up a little. Do you have a... I don't know. Grandma, little sister, anyone who could have called you to take care of them because they are sick or something like that?"

"Why would they call me?", Zayn sighed. "I need something better, something convincing and urgent... ha!"

"Ha?", Louis repeated and let the leftover of his cigarette fall to the ground. "Got something?"

"Depends... Hey, Louis?"

"Yeah?", he answered cautiously when Zayn's voice all of a sudden turned soft as velvet.

"I need your help to get out of here. I would owe you one, mate."

"What do I have to do with anything?"

"You were ill the last days. You could say that you feel poorly again and I had to take you home? See it that way, you would get credits for returning before you were completely fine again. Such a motivated student."

"Yeah... well, no." Louis shook his head grinning. "You have to think about something else."

"Louis, come on! Can't you see how awesome that plan is?"

"For you, of course", Louis laughed. "All it would get me into on the other hand is trouble with my best friend and flatmate because he has to get home by bus for three days in a row."

"Tell him to find Liam. He can drop him off."

"But..."

"Your argument is invalid. What else?" Louis was saved from having to answer when the bell called the end of the break. "Ok. I need your decision now, Louis. Yes or No?"

Louis opened his mouth to form a loud and clear 'no', but what came out was a small, surprised sounding "Okay."

Zayn smirked. "Rebellious today, aren't we? I knew you wouldn't let me down. Thanks mate. Now just look pale and tired and let me do the talking, and we'll be out in no time."

 

***

 

_> I'm leaving with Zayn. He said you should talk to Liam, he'll take you home.<_

Niall shook his head as he read the message he's gotten from his best friend. Sure. Louis was on the road with Zayn. Yeah. Of course. He quickly dialed the number and waited for Louis to pick up the call.

"Yeah?"

"Hey. Where are you?"

"I'm heading towards the city right now. Zayn's driving."

"Okay. And where are you for real?"

On the other side of the line, he heard a deep sigh. "Zayn, say hi to Niall."

"Hi Niall!"

Niall raised his eyebrows as another voice which definitely didn't belong to Louis was answering. "Care to explain?"

"Later, when I get home, okay?"

"I guess..." Niall wasn't completely happy with that answer. He was way too curious... but maybe Liam would know what was going on. "So, you really think I should talk to Liam?"

"Yeah. Zayn said it will be okay, and that he'll take you home."

"Good. Then... have fun?"

"You too! Bye."

"Bye." Niall ended the call and pushed his hair back.

Okay. First thing on his to-do-list was to find Liam. Second one to find out what the fuck was going on here.

Liam turned out to be found pretty easily. During the next break, Niall went out at the school yard looking for the older boy. He stood at exactly the same spot they'd met yesterday. Only difference was, instead of Zayn and Harry he was accompanied by only Harry.

"Hey", he said shyly while he moved closer to the boys.

"Hey Niall." Liam smiled, obviously surprised by Niall's presence. Harry said nothing, but his eyes never left the blonde's face.

"I... am, sorry about yesterday, okay?"

"Okay." Liam shrugged grinning. "Don't let yourself grow gray hair about it. Everybody has an off day every now and then."

"Thanks." Niall smiled relieved. "So, uhm, yeah... I got a message from Louis that he left with Zayn."

"I noticed." Liam shook his head. "Both of them were gone after after the last break. I just didn't think they'd left together."

Niall was a little disappointed. "I hoped you'd know what was going on here", he muttered.

"Sorry. I'm just as surprised as you are. Maybe even more", Liam murmured and tried to catch Harry's gaze. "Haz? D'you know anything?"

"Why exactly should I care?", the curly haired boy asked with unimpressed voice.

Liam just shrugged and turned back to Niall. "So. I'm afraid I can't help you."

"Erm... I think you can, in fact. I... Ah, you know what? Forget it. Have a nice day."

"Hey. Stop." Liam caught Niall's arm before he was able to sprint away. "You wanted something else, didn't you?"

Niall blushed lightly. "They... Louis said that Zayn suggested... but it's a bad idea anyway. I'll just take the bus. Don't mind."

"You speak in riddles, young one." Liam smiled patiently.

"Zayn said you could possibly maybe take me home after school, but like I said~"

"Possibly maybe?" Liam chuckled, ignoring the glare Niall sent towards him. "No problem mate."

"Yeah, I, so... what, really?"

"I guess. When are you finished for the day?"

"Just two more hours, and you?"

"Me too. So, you see. No problem at all."

Niall nodded, processing the new information. He hadn't been wrong, Liam really was a decent guy. He wasn't sure about his friends, though. He might have gotten Zayn's words into the wrong throat, but he'd think about that when he finally would hear what was happening with him and Lou. And Harry seemed to be nothing but a grump - but he didn't know him at all, maybe he shouldn't be so quick to judge. Most definitely he shouldn't.

"Thank you", Niall smiled. "I have to go now, though. Got an exam coming up next week, and I can't afford to miss a single minute if I want to pass."

Liam laughed quietly. "Well, I don't want to be the one who's to blame if you fail, right? Meet me at the parking space after school, will ya?"

"Sure. See you." Niall waved a bit sheepishly. "And thanks again", he called over his shoulder and sprinted towards his classroom.

 

***

 

"Still can't believe you talked me into this", Louis muttered as he climbed out of the car. "Can I have my key back now?"

Zayn had insisted that he should be the one to drive the car from the parking lot at school, since Louis was sick and he had to take care. Just... for the unexpectable case that a teacher looked out at the window down to the students parking lot and gave a fuck about who was behind the steering wheel.

"Can you catch?" Without giving Louis the chance to answer, Zayn threw the desired object towards his owner. He chuckled as the smaller boy caught it with an almost graceful movement of his hand. "Seems like you can. I have to make a call, wait a second."

"Yeah, whatever." Louis stuffed the key into his pocket and shifted from one leg to another while he tried not to listen to the conversation between Zayn and 'babe'. He smoothed down his fringe with his fingers, but it wasn't really working out. The wind blew it back into his eyes almost immediately. Maybe he should take the chance to get a haircut. God alone knew when he could be bothered to get to the city next time.

Zayn still hadn't stopped talking, so Louis rested his back against the car and crossed his arms in front of his chest. He didn't really know why he was waiting at all. When Zayn's girlfriend appeared on the scene, it would be his time to leave anyway.

"Yeah, okay. We'll meet you right there."

"We do?", Louis muttered under his breath.

"We do."

Louis chuckled. He didn't seem to have spoken as quietly as he used to think. He turned his body to Zayn, who'd ended the call by now.

"She wants to grab a coffee at BarCelona, and I could use one, too. So, let's go."

"I could leave, though", Louis suggested.

"Why would you do that?" Zayn, who'd already started walking stopped in his tracks. "You gave me this wonderful chance to get out off the hellhole some people call school, so the last thing I can do is to buy you a coffee. You know. For being my partner in crime."

"Don't you want to spend time alone with your girl?"

"No, it's cool." Zayn smiled and shrugged. "So, are you in?"

He was not. Absolutely not. Getting a haircut, get home and watch some silly shit on telly, that was the plan for today. Maybe get wasted with Niall a bit later. But not meeting some mysterious girlfriend of bloke he'd spoken to two times in his whole existence. He opened his mouth to tell Zayn exactly that. "I am", came out instead, and he instantly wanted to smash his face against the next stone wall that would cross his way.

This was the second time his lips betrayed him today. Fucking great.

"Then what are we waiting for?" Zayn tapped his foot onto the ground impatiently. "Come on, now. I'm sure you'll like her."

 


End file.
